His Childhood Friend is a Beautiful, Reclusive Girl, So He Spends His After-School Hours in Her Room (But He’s Not Her Boyfriend!) - Ch. 34: Accidental Template Attack (Souta's Turn)

“How’s that? Are you healed?”
“It was bizarrely soothing…”
“Then that’s good.”

Yuika smugly said, “hmm,” and let go of the hands that were holding me. But I couldn’t put any strength into my body, so I slid down from her chest to her belly button.
Her bre*sts bounced. It seemed that she was still in her Onee-san mode.

On the other hand, I’m feeling strangely fulfilled and weak, and I languish on Yuika’s lap.

“I want to fall asleep like this…”
“That’s fine. Why don’t you go rest in your Onee-san’s lap for a while?”
“You usually don’t want me on your lap…”
“Today is special because seeing you so helpless is so cute♪”

Yuika-san looked very happy. She stroked me on her lap.
It’s soothing… But I have a strong feeling that it might ruin me as a person.

“…Ugh. Get up, get up, I…”
“Oh? Still the hardworking?”
“I’m a hard worker… If I continue to depend on Yuika, I will become a useless person!”
“That’s fine. I’m totally dependent on Souta, you know?”
“Don’t worry about yourself! I’ll protect you for the rest of my life!”
“What!?”

For some reason, Yuika’s nudging attack stopped. This was my chance. Manifesting my willpower and pride, I emerged from Yuika’s lap with a push-up.

“Yay, I overcame temptation! That’s great, me. I’m so proud of you! I scored a million points today!”

I leaned my back against the edge of the bed.
… And for some reason, Yuika turned bright red and froze.

“…So-Souta. What… was that?”
“Yeah? What’s what?”
“That thing…my about protecting me for life.”
“? I didn’t mean anything by it, okay?”
“How can you say such a thing with such a natural face!?”

She started stomping on the floor.

“No, for life really means for life! It means from birth to death. Do you even know what that means?”
“…? Of course I know that. What are you saying?”
“～～～～”

She started to pucker up her face.

“Be-because… I’m a recluse!”
“I know. I know it better than anyone in the world.”
“You know how hard it is to take care of me!?”
“What are you saying? I’m the leading expert in this field.”

“What if I never leave my room!?”
“You’ve been trying hard to get out lately, haven’t you? And—”
“Ah, no! Don’t say anything past that! I knew instantly what you were going to say, so don’t say anything! Oh my, Souta no bakaaaa!”

Something started stumbling around on the floor at a very high speed.
Hmm, I don’t get it. I don’t know why she’s so shocked about now.

As I tilted my head, Yuika suddenly stopped.
She looked like she was frustrated and moaned, “gununu…”

“The look on your face is really, really annoying…”
“Even if you say so…”
“Souta is now a typical dense protagonist…”
“Wait a minute! Don’t label me that! I’m not a protagonist, and even if I were, I’d be unusually perceptive in the compared to other dense protagonists, I promise.”

“That’s not true. The Souta of now is dense. If I had to use an analogy, I’d say that he’s like the hero who asks why the heroine was surprised when ‘the heroine has been trying to avoid thinking about the future because she’s a recluse, but then he easily comes up with a solution.’”
“That’s not an analogy at all—”
“—Pointing out what’s not there is also insensitive in this case, isn’t it?”
“My argument was successfully shut down…”

I was a little troubled.
The princess was in a bad mood, and I wondered what to do about it. … But I quickly thought of something
Since I’m at this point, let’s give back what I have experienced.

“Yuika, Yuika.”
“Wha-what…?”

I opened my arms to my childhood friend who was still on the floor.

“Come to me. I’ll give you a hug, pat your head, and heal you in return.”
“Eh!?”
“Hurry up.”
“No, no, no. If you hug me like that, my heart will explode and I’ll die!”
“It’s all right, it’s all right. You won’t feel like that. That’s what happened to me earlier.”

“Souta is on a different level! If I were to use an analogy, it would be the difference between the DIO of part 1 and the DIO who has reached heaven!”
“Isn’t that usually DIO from part 3?”
“That’s how different the levels are! Why can’t you see that? Souta’s insensitive!”
“You are asking me to understand the feelings of a maiden in the form of the evil emperor, but…”
[TLN: Referencing to Jojo. I have not watched it myself.]

I tried to approach her, but she screamed, “No way, no way, no way!”
The speed was as if she had released a time stop to me. Yeah, this is the evil emperor of the third work.

“Hey, Yuika.”
“Ugh, I’m not sure I can look Souta in the face and talk to him for the next few hours. Please leave for the day.”
“It’s unusual for you to say something like that. Well, I’ll be working on my schoolwork at the table for now.”
“No, I told you to leave!”
“It’s not like I’m going home just because you say so.”
“Mou!”

The bun wriggled. Then something long and thin popped out from the cover, hit me in the face, and sagged down.

“I’ll give you that, go home!”
“Hmm? What’s this… what!?”

It was a bra.
It was black, lacy, and faintly warm. It was freshly taken off.

“Wha!? Wait, this is…!?”
“…Give it back to me if you’re not going home.”
“Oh, I just remembered something. I’m going home. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“No, I’m still going to miss you, so please come early tomorrow, okay?”
“Yeah.”

I threw my most prized possession into my school bag before Yuika changed her mind, and I left the room briskly.
Then.
As if he heard the sound of the door close, Iori came out of his room.

“Souta Nii-chan, I’m sorry about earlier. I’m sure I misunderstood something—”

Iori stopped in mid-sentence.
His gaze was fixed on a single point.

A black bra was sticking out of my bag.

His eyes looked dead and he smiled.
His door closed at the speed of sound.
I dashed up to Iori’s door and slammed it.

“It’s not like that! You’re mistaken, Iori! This is not stolen goods or anything like that. You’re misunderstanding me right now!”
“It’s filthy! Souta Nii-chan and Onee-chan are so close that they would give each other underwear as souvenirs!”
“Whoa! I mean you’re not mistaken! Ah! There’s no excuse for this!”

In the end, my overly perceptive otouto did not understand, and I screamed with agony.