About the Reckless Girl Who Kept Challenging a Reborn Man Like Me - Volume 1 Chapter 3: Growing Up, Them

As the months passed, we moved on to higher education.

The petals of the cherry blossoms fluttered with the wind, and the new season welcomed our entrance to the school.

Anya, Sophie, Costas and I were able to enter the same famous preparatory school. All of us, except for Sophie, were able to enter the school as ‘special’ students. The school fees were free for us. It was a great act of filial piety. I couldn’t help but compare it to the salary that I had earned in my previous life.

Since I had the benefit of “Reincarnation”, it was only natural that I was given the right to be a ‘special student,’ but I think Anya and Costas were truly amazing for managing to earn that position with their own efforts.

“Haa~! I’m so glad I got in!”

“Good job, Sophie.”

“Thank you Costas.‘

Sophie breathed a sigh of relief as she walked through the school gates. She couldn’t drop the level of the school she wanted to go to because of her mother’s passion for education. Unfortunately, Sophie had missed out on the chance of getting a special scholarship, but it was still a great achievement to have been accepted into the school. Although they’re just distantly related, they are still related to my previous life. It seemed that my relationship with these two would continue on this time.

“I’ve got a lot of work to do! I’m going to catch up with you and beat you on the tests this time! Prepare yourself!”

Anya declared to me with great vigor with the falling cherry petals on her head. I couldn’t help but burst out laughing as I listened to her declaration that she had made a fresh start by becoming a student in high school, but for me it was no different from when she was little.

When Anya saw me, she pouted as if she was in a bad mood. I can’t help but burst out laughing again when I heard her declare that she’s not in a good mood.

“This will be the only time you can afford to laugh anymore…!”

Well that’s what she said. The cherry blossom petals were fluttering in the air, and everyone around me was wearing their brand new school uniforms. They were walking through the school gates with a bit of anticipation and a little bit of nervousness in their hearts. I felt like I had grown up one step further than before, and was excited about my new life, whilst basking in the beautiful sunshine of spring.

At that time, I was approached unexpectedly by some unknown person.

“Oh… Are you.. Zeke?”

I turned around and looked at the owner of the voice. It wasn’t a classmate from middle school, but he had still guessed my name right, so he probably didn’t have the wrong person. The person, who seemed to be a new student like me, looked at me with a surprised but happy smile.

Right… I remember this face. It has grown, but I definitely recall it in my memories.

“Could it be… Paris?”

“Oh! I’m so glad you remembered me! I’m so happy! Zeke!”

He approached me with great enthusiasm and placed his arm around my neck and squared his shoulder up with mine.

“Paris, you’ve grown up, huh? Look at you.”

“What are you, some old relative I haven’t seen in a while? You sound like an old man! Good to see you!”

“Leave me alone.”

Paris, always as happy as ever, laughed and laughed. I could only shrug my shoulders at that response.

“Are you an acquaintance of Zeke?”

“…………”

Sophie and Costas tilted their heads, a little surprised at the man who suddenly appeared and squared shoulders with me.

“Let me introduce you. This is Paris, who Anya and I went to school with when we were kids”

“Hi! My name is Paris and I like to play soccer. My preference is an older sexy lady. Nice to meet you!”

Paris made a peace sign and introduced himself which made Sophie’s mouth twitch slightly.

A friendly guy he is, Paris. He was the guy who became my friend on my first day at the cram school.

“I’m Costas. Nice to meet you.”

“Oh! Nice to meet you! I thought you’d distance yourself because of my personality. You’re really kind! I look forward to being with you!”

“Oh…”

Costas greeted Paris with the minimum of words necessary.

“M-My name is Sophie, and I was the class representative in middle school for 3 years. It’s nice to meet you Paris-kun”

“Whoa?! An honor student?! Neat! Nice to meet you!”

After greeting Sophie, Paris approached Anya. Paris had been in the same cram school as me, so of course he was familiar with Anya. Paris smiled at her as if he had met an old friend after a long time.

“It’s been a long time, Anya! How have you been? That frown on your face is so unique that I recognized you as Anya right away.”

“…………”

“Are you still hanging out with Zeke? You guys haven’t changed at all. I feel relieved.”

“…………”

Anya was stunned and kept her mouth shut. What’s going on here…?

“Hey…”

“Huh?”

Anya chattered in a mosquito-like voice.

“Who are you?”

Paris’ smile froze. My expression froze as well.

“See, you heard me, right? I’m Paris… The same Paris that went to cram school with you before? The one you spent 5 years with at that cram school.”

“I don’t know you.”

“…………”

Anya… Are you serious?

“S-See, Anya. Don’t you remember? Paris… The cheerful Paris that was in the same cram school as us.”

“Was there someone like that before?”

Anya said those few words in a boring and ruthless manner.

“Se-Seriously…”

Paris was shocked and fell to his knees on the ground. He was knocked down badly. Anya’s mental attack had pierced deep into Paris, breaking his heart.

“Y-You’re still the same as ever, Anya, you never change.”

“I don’t remember anyone being this weird in my life.”

“Oi, don’t do it. Don’t you do it, Anya”

It’s just too much now. Paris was on his knees just continuously writing the 8s on the ground. It’s been a while since they met but she was acting as if this was the first time Anya had ever met him. He had been her classmate for 5 years in cram school so she should at least have some childhood familiarity with him. 

“About that… I’m sorry…”

I put my hand on Paris’ shoulder, which was getting smaller and smaller with the teasing.

“If you were in the same middle school as her, you should have disciplined her properly, Zeke.”

“I’m sorry.”

This girl doesn’t really listen to me though. I gave up on disciplining her early on in cram school.

Spring is a beautiful time of the year, and our first day of school began with a wry smile.

And so our life in high school began. As expected, the classes in high school were very difficult. The content of our studies became more and more advanced than before. I no longer had as much time to relax as I had in the past.

“Zeke! Zeke! Today’s quiz is a contest! Don’t run away!”

“How am I supposed to run away from a quiz in the middle of class…?”

In spite of all of this, Anya still came at me as often as she did in elementary and middle school. Even though she’s now a student in senior high school, she hadnever wavered or changed at all since we first met. Her eyes are still sparkling as bright as ever.

“Don’t be surprised to see me in a different light now that I’m a high school student!”

“No, you haven’t changed at all, have you?”

“That’s not true!”

“So tell me what’s changed about you then.”

“………………Let’s play! Zeke!”

I turned my head with a wry smile at how innocent she was.

In about three months, she would also be known as the “Ice Queen”. Sophie, who knew Anya well, and her classmates from middle school could only laugh at that.

In nine months, it occurred.

It was an incident that people around me didn’t think much of. But it was still a big, big incident between Anya and me.

For me in particular, I think this was a turning point or should I say a fork in the road.

“Huh….?”

Anya rolled her eyes and looked at the rankings for the third semester’s midterm exams, which were prominently displayed in front of the elevator. She blinked her eyes repeatedly, staring at the rankings of those who had performed well on the test. She rubbed her own eyes once more and then looked again.

‘Zeke, First Place, 790 Points

Anya, First Place, 790 Points’

That’s what was written on the rankings list.

Her cheeks flushed and her eyes sparkled.

“ZEKE!”

She ran to me at once and looked up at me with a big smile on her face. It was as if joy was gushing out of her body like steam on a hot drink.

“ZEKE!”

She called up to me again up close. I don’t think it really meant anything, but I think she was just happy in this situation.

“I’m finally catching up to you! The first time! The first time! The first time! This is the first time we’ve ever lined up together!”

She seemed so happy and she kept repeating the words ‘first time’ over and over again. When we were in primary school, we often scored 100 points together. But she was never satisfied with that. For her, both 100s were a sign of unmeasurable failure, a malfunction of the testing equipment. It was just a draw between us. And it was a draw that she was not very happy about.

So this was actually the first time we had ever tied for anything other than a perfect score, and she was just so happy about it.

“We lined up! We lined up! All I have to do now is pass you! I’m going to win! I’ve lined up! I’VE FINALLY LINED UP WITH ZEKE!”

She looked happy, really happy. Her eyes sparkled like jewels, so much so that it made me happy just by looking at her.

“Prepare yourself!”

That’s what she said and smiled. She was laughing with such hope in her heart, as if the future were made of jewels.

……But, Anya. It’s been nine years, nine long years.

It’s been almost 9 years since we’ve started competing with each other.

The cracks are starting to show, Anya.

It wouldn’t take long before the cracks started growing even further.

“I won! …I won! I won! I won! I won! I won!”

‘Anya, First Place, 795 Points

Zeke, Second Place, 791 Points’

On the midterm exam of the second semester of my second year, I lost to Anya for the first time. It was the first time in my life that I had ever lost in a competition of test scores against her.

At first, when Anya saw the ranking list, she was blown away. Rather than seeing something incredible, she just didn’t know what was going on at all and her mind went completely blank. She just looked up in a daze, opened her mouth, and rolled her eyes while her mind went into outer space.

Was it about 5 minutes? She finally regained consciousness, understood what she saw and began exploding in joy.

“I did it! I did it! I did it! I did it! I did it!!!!!!”

She jumped up and down, her face bright red, her whole body expressing her joy in a way that was completely unlike her nickname, the “Ice Queen.”

“I did it! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!”

Then she came running to me again, took both my hands, who was supposed to be her enemy and waved them up in the air. Her face beamed, and she threw me  around in a feverish gaze.

I couldn’t do anything but give a troubled laugh at this.

There was no other way it could have gone after all.

“Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy!”

With that, Anya frantically ran away from the school gate.

“Ah! Hold on! Anya! Get back here! Come back! We still have a few classes left!”

Forgetting her classes, Anya ran out of the school on impulse. She forgot herself and ran away. Before I could stop her, she ran off like a tornado, buoyed by the fever of joy she had experienced over the past ten years.

She received a generous scolding from her teacher the next day.

It was a sight to behold.

It was funny, but ever since that day, I have been aware that the cracks within me have come into clear view. It wasn’t the shock of defeat. I wasn’t frustrated, annoyed, or shocked that I had lost for the first time.

However, a certain determination was beginning to grow in me. The time to come was approaching. I began to feel that I had to be prepared for it.

The cracks have already begun to show after all.

I’m sure the cracks have actually been there ever since middle school or maybe even earlier than that.

I felt that the time of separation between me and her was not far off anymore.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

“Cake!”

“Huh?”

“Cake! Cake! Of course it’s cake!”

In a classroom one afternoon, Anya began to say something incomprehensible.

“Don’t tell me you forgot!”

“…………”

She pointed at me with her hands on her hips and her chest heaving. No, I’m sorry, I have no idea what you’re talking about. I wish I could say I forgot. But, I’m sure she’ll just get mad if I tell her that.

“I told you the first time I lost. One day I’m going to beat you and you’re going to give me a cake!”

“…………”

“If I win, I get a cake from you!”

“……Ah.”

I dug up memories of the cake from the bottom of my memory.

That’s it! She’s talking about the prize cake from the cram school!

“You forgot! You…!”

Anya was pouting and looked angry at me.

That’s right. When I was a kid, the cram school we went to had a reward for good test scores: sweets. In the first test I took, I beat Anya, who had always been in first place, and I received an expensive cake as my prize for placing first.

At that time, Anya ran out of the cram school in tears. Afterwards, Anya declared war on me, saying that she would eventually beat me and take the cake away from me. Of course, there is no way I would have left such an old cake behind for such a long time.

“How can you remember something that happened such a long time ago? That must have been about ten years ago.”

“Nine years and eight months.”

“…………”

That’s an impressive obsession with the cake…

“Come on! Cake! Cake! Cake! Give me the Cake!”

“Wait a minute, Anya! Calm down!”

“Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake!”

Anya grabs me by the chest and shakes me back and forth. Does she think that if she shakes me, a piece of cake will fall out of my clothes? I feel like I’m being eaten alive currently. There’s no way there’s any cake left from that long ago. Is that not obvious?

“A-Ahh… Don’t worry, Anya. I’m keeping that cake. I’ll give it to you when I get home.”

“That’s definitely rotten! Throw it away!”

“…………”

Good, the joke worked. I wondered what I would do if she took me seriously.

“You want me to buy you a cake?”

“What else did you think I want?”

“No… Didn’t you say something like ‘I’ll win it back one day, so keep it somewhere safe for me’ or so?”

“If you keep the cake for so long, it’ll go bad. Are you stupid or something? How could I say such a thing?”

“What the hell…”

Did I remember it wrong? Surely common sense would tell you that keeping a cake for a long time would make the cake rot.

How did the conversation go? It was more than nine years ago, after all. My memory is obviously a little hazy at this point. If the conversation was saved in my memory bank, I would like to listen to it again.

“I’m telling you, one cake is not enough at all. I’d like to eat seven or eight cakes! I want lots of cakes!”

“Are you sure you’re not eating too much cake?”

“Of course! The winner eats everything up with arrogance and pride! There is no such thing as a reduction for me!”

“You’ll get fat eating so much though?!”

It’s only for a day, Anya said, not afraid of the sugar she would consume. I’m not going to turn down Anya’s wish, though the price of eight cakes would be ridiculous. It was a promise made about ten years ago, and there was no way I was going to let her down. I guess I’ll just have to put up with the fact that my wallet will be a little lighter for a while.

Can you even eat 8 cakes in a row…?

“Eight cakes is normal.”

“No, it’s not normal, okay?”

“It’s normal. It’s a cake buffet.”

Hmm? Cake buffet……?

“You see, There was this buffet for cakes near the cram school we went to 2 years and 7 months ago.”

“No, I don’t recall such a thing.”

“That’s right. I’ve always wanted to visit this place after I beat you!”

Anya smiled, the corners of her mouth lifting at the realization of her long-held wish. It was the smile of a happy child. When I see that smile, I can’t help but lose my venom.

“All right, let’s go there then. We’ll go there next weekend alright?”

“Wash your neck and wait for me!”

“I’ve already lost, you know.”

It was after this that my washed neck would be slashed.

“Whoa! What the hell? Are you two going on a date together? Whoo! Such youth!”

Just then, Paris approached us, whistling like an onlooker. What a troublesome man.

“Paris, don’t be an idiot.”

“Now, now, don’t be shy.”

Paris looked at us with a smirk on his face. What a troublesome man he is.

“Why don’t you just go ahead and make out without any weird excuses!”

“Your head is all pink, you know that?” [TLN: It means his head is full of naughty stuff.]

“All students are like this, you know. But you can’t have impure sexual intercourse, okay? You have to be moderate about it. Hey, Anya?”

“…………”

“Anya…?”

“Who the hell are you?”

“That’s terrible to say, isn’t it? Anya!?”

Anya looked at Paris coldly and said the same thing that she had said at their reunion.

“Anya, this is Paris. You see, he’s our classmate.”

“It was a joke.”

“Are you sure that was a joke? Anya!?”

Anya looked away from the lamenting Paris. Well, don’t worry, it’s indeed a joke… It is a joke… right…?

Anya kept her eyes averted from Paris throughout the remaining conversation.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

“Waaahhh! Waaaahhhh! Waaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh…….”

Anya’s eyes sparkled as if she were looking at a jewel, and uncontrollable joy leaked out of her mouth in a weird sparkling voice.

“Look, look, look! Zeke! There’s so much…..! There’s so much of it at-”

“Yes, yes, I know. I know, I know, so calm down, Anya!”

“Ohhhhh~~~ I didn’t even know there was such a thing in this world! Heeeeh~~~”

Everyone around me giggled at the sight of Anya frolicking like a child. I felt a little embarrassed at that.

One day deep into autumn, Anya and I were out at a cake buffet as promised. The restaurant was beautifully decorated with flowers and other decorations that women would like, and the glass showcases at the place were filled with various colorful cakes.

Due to a promise made nearly ten years ago, I had brought her to a cake buffet just because Anya had beaten me in a test after so long.

“This, This, This and This.”

“No, Anya, you’re taking too much, aren’t you?”

Each cake was pretty small, probably due to the fact that it was a cake buffet, so they ensured that we could enjoy a large variety of cakes at the place. I took two kinds of different cakes on my plate and went to go back to my seat, but Anya, who was standing beside me, piled up even more cakes on her plate. She just kept piling up more and more and more.

She had the eyes of a greedy hunter hunting her prey.

“There’s another stomach for cake so don’t worry!”

“No, I came here hungry, so there’s nothing for me to eat separately.”

The cake buffet was disrupting her ability to speak.

“I’ve been wanting to come here for a long time…”

Anya smiles happily as she chews on the cake. She’s indeed a girl for whom sweet feeding is effective in times of trouble.

This cake shop is located near the cram school we used to attend. The school used to reward the top students with cakes from a nearby cake shop. This cake buffet was a new shop opened by the bakery after they expanded their business. So in a way, what Anya had said almost ten years ago about getting my cake back was really coming true.

The nostalgic taste spreads in my mouth as well. Delicious, so delicious.

This restaurant had a 90-minute all-you-can-eat time limit, but 90 minutes seemed like a long time to me. However, the way Anya was eating the cake with her cheeks melting, she didn’t seem to feel such a thing in the slightest.

“That cake looks delicious.”

I said, looking at the cake on Anya’s plate. It was a cake of chocolate mousse with cocoa flavored cookies scattered on top.

“Have you ever seen a cake like that?”

“It’s there. It was at the end of the shelf.”

“I see.”

Was it just a simple oversight? It was when I was thinking that I would eat the next cake after I finished the one in front of me.

“Here, Zeke.”

“Hmm?”

“Want some?”

She stuck a small piece of cake on her fork and pointed it towards me, who was facing her. She was looking up at me as she leaned forward a little and offered the piece to me.

…………What’s this?

……Is this an attempt to get me to eat her cake? Am I supposed to take the cake she offers with my mouth and eat it?

Commonly referred to as…… ‘ahh’?

I felt my cheeks heat up at that thought.

“No, I don’t want it! I’ll get it myself later!”

“Sure, I guess…”

Anya easily withdrew the cake and ate it herself immediately afterwards.

“Hnng~! So yummy~!”

“…………”

Anya gobbled up the cake as if nothing had ever happened, and it seems like my heartbeat didn’t want to stop for quite a while.

What the heck is she suddenly doing? Isn’t feeding each other food the kind of embarrassing thing that lovers do?

But Anya showed no signs of embarrassment at all. As usual, she just ate cake after cake, her tongue clenched in happiness.

I was the only one who was flustered at this situation.

“A-Anya…”

“Hmm? What?”

“A-Ah, I-I think you should refrain from this kind of behaviour. Even if you didn’t intend to mislead the person.”

“Hmm?”

Anya put her finger on her chin, searching for the meaning of what I was saying. To her, what she had just done must have been pretty insignificant.

“You mean that ‘Ahh’ thing I did earlier?”

“Ye-Yeah, that’s it.”

I got flustered every time she said the word ‘ahh’

“…………”

“…………”

“Pfft!”

Anya started laughing.

“Hahaha! Zeke! You’re such an idiot!”

“…………”

“Why are you so flustered over something like that? How many years do you think we’ve been together now?”

Anya giggles at my slightly stained cheeks.

“We’re just childhood friends now.”

“…………”

She said that as a matter of course. I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.

Wouldn’t it be embarrassing if we weren’t actually childhood friends?

“Well, yeah. Right?”

“…………”

If you spend a lot of time together from an early age, the distance between your hearts will become shorter and you will naturally become closer to each other.

But it’s true that I may just be a childhood friend to Anya.

But that’s not the case for me. For me, Anya is not just a childhood friend.

I met Anya when I was seven years old at a cram school. We’ve been together for the past ten years, so I guess I’m just a childhood friend to Anya.

But not me. Including my previous life, I am currently 45 years old. I died at 28, was reborn, and am now living for 17 more years, only 10 out of 45 years. Only ten years. How could that make me feel like she’s a childhood friend to me?

The distance between our hearts is different.

To her, I’m just a childhood friend who she’s been with since she was a little girl, and she doesn’t think anything of it when we feed each other. However, I, on the other hand, get flustered at such a thing. I get flustered whenever she gets close to me and whenever I get close to her.

It makes me feel very shy.

“I’d gladly give you an ‘Ahh’ anytime.”

Anya said as she teased me.

I scratched my head in annoyance and tried to cover up my embarrassment.

—

We left the store and began walking our way home. Soon after, we arrived at Anya’s house.

“Uuu…”

Anya was crying out in pain. She was grunting and groaning a lot. I was fanning her with a fan, as if to comfort her from her pain.

“I ate too much…….”

“……It’s no wonder that’s the case after you ate that much.”

It was inevitable that I stopped by her house. She had eaten so much that she couldn’t even move properly, so I went and helped her go to her house as if I were caring for her.

“Painful… My other stomach… is too full.”

“You’re a hard woman to please, aren’t you.”

Anya is not just a childhood friend to me. But I understand what she is now. Fanning her with a fan makes me feel like I’m her guardian. For the past ten years, I’ve been acting as her guardian.

I looked at her slumped in the living room and sighed.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

“Hmmm.”

“Hmmm.”

It’s the fall of my third year of high school, and the classroom is filled with the sound of people roaring. They’re scratching their heads in agony and glaring at their textbooks with bloodshot eyes.

The third year of high school was approaching, and the university entrance examinations that everyone suffers from were looming in the distance.

“Hmmm!!”

“Hmmm!!”

“You guys look like you’re in trouble, huh.”

“Why do you have to be such a stranger, Anya?”

Sophie and Paris were also grunting and groaning in pain. Next to them, Anya replied comfortably as she nibbled on one of my snacks.

“Because I’m academically prepared for it.”

“…………”

“Hey, stop it, Anya. Stop provoking the two of them. They’re looking at you like you’re a murderer.”

It was unavoidable, but I couldn’t help but feel a bit cynical at that.

Anya and I’s first choice was to attend the country’s top national university. It was only natural. We attend one of the most advanced schools in the country, and we are competing to be number one or number two. It was only natural that we would aim for the highest and most difficult university in the country.

And there are quite a few students in this school who want to go to that exact same university. Costas, Sophie, and Paris are also attempting to apply at the same university as us.

Anya, and Costas and I have done well in our mock exams and have gotten good ‘A’ grades. I don’t mean to be careless, but if things continue on like this, we’ll probably get into the same university with no issues.

It was Sophie and Paris who seemed to be struggling at it though.

“My mom is so passionate about education that she won’t accept me unless I go to the most difficult university in the country!”

“That’s a disaster.”

Sophie was on the verge of tears as she said this. She has a mother with very high expectations after all.

“Your grandfather, Govan, and your father, Shiro-san, seem to have a soft spot for you, don’t they?”

“My father is a son-in-law.”

“They’re all wrapped between my pinky.”

Even though they said Shiro-san is Govan’s son. Sophie is and Govan’s surname is different. So Shiro-san is a son in law, huh?

“Rather, why are you the only one who calls our grandfather without any honorifics, Zeke?”

“It doesn’t mean anything.”

Sophie’s grandfather, Govan, was a colleague of mine in a previous life. I didn’t feel like putting too much respect on him, and sometimes I couldn’t feel like I had any respect for him. There’s no way I can explain how that happened, though.

Costas then spoke up.

“For now, I just want Sophie to do her best. I want us to go to the same university anyways.”

“Costas-kun”

Costas and Sophie have known each other since they were children. It’s rare for Costas to say something like this outright.

“I can’t stand not going to the same university as you, so help me out.”

“Ku! It’s true that I’m worried about leaving Costas alone, but… That’s right! If I succeed in this exam, I can keep having Costas help me in the future.”

Sophie held her head up.

“Will I have to take care of Costas for the rest of my life!?”

Costas is a genius. He’s quick-witted and always gets top grades, but just like Anya, he too lacks common sense. He’s always followed by his childhood friend, Sophie. Even so, I’ve never seen the two of them get into an argument before, which makes me think that they truly are childhood friends. But why do geniuses always have a couple of screws loose in their head?

“By the way, Sophie. I’m talking about the poisonous mushroom display that you want to put up at the festival.”

“Rejected! Rejected! And REJECTED!”

“I see…”

Sophie rejected the idea which resulted in Costas nodding his head with his shoulder arched.

Well, the school festival is almost here.

The current conversation reminded me of this. The date of the school’s cultural festival is rapidly approaching.

As they were preparing for their exams, the third year students were encouraged to keep their performances for the festival light. However, since Sophie had been a member of the festival committee last year, she has been sought after for advice from the younger students and it has been quite difficult for her. She has a talent for management it seems.

And Costas is apparently selfishly telling Sophie that he wants to compile the results of his research on poisonous stuff, his hobby, and display them at the school festival, but Sophie is having none of it. Costas was planning to show the refining of the poison as a public experiment, so it was only natural that he was stopped.

Did he think that such an experiment would actually be allowed at the school? I don’t know what geniuses think about sometimes.

“Where’s Zeke going to be going?”

“Well, there’s a class that does classical theater, so I think I’ll be watching that. I’m also interested in the planetarium or the haunted house.”

“Can you even make a planetarium on your own?”

“They say it’s possible. Apparently it can be done by making small holes in very specific  coordinates. It’s a lot of work, but they say the principle is simple.”

“Hmmm. I’m not interested in classical theater, but I am interested in the planetarium and haunted house. Let’s go around together, Zeke.”

“Oh, nice.”

“I’m gonna scare the crap out of you in the haunted house!”

“You’re a customer, you know…”

When I was having such a conversation with Anya, Sophie and Paris threw me a resentful glance. Their glances seemed to say ‘We’re having such a hard time with our exams while y’all are so relaxed over there.’

During the exam period, it’s easy to get caught up in jealousy and envy. It can’t be helped.

“Sophie and Paris, why don’t you both just take a breather and enjoy the festival? It’s important to relax your shoulders sometimes.”

“Hello! I’m in a tight spot over here! I can’t relax my shoulders like this!”

“That’s it! That’s it! I can’t afford such a thing! I’ve got to study!”

“…………”

I’ve said it before, but it’s true that if they had properly studied from the start, they wouldn’t have any trouble right now.

However, it is true that a change of scenery is important for your health. The exam period is still going on. Continuing to study alone in an environment where you know everyone else is having fun turns into a strong painful feeling. The only day you need to really take a break is the day of the cultural festival.

“Don’t make the mistake of staying home and studying all alone, okay? Costas, get Sophie out of the house that day.”

“Got it.”

Costas gave a short reply and stroked the head of his young familiar with his large hand.

“Uuu.”

Sophie let out a small moan and let Costas ruffle her hair, but she didn’t look disgusted at it, she just let him continue doing it.

“Patience is important, but this patience is poisonous to your body and mind. You have to force yourself to enjoy it.”

“I’ll take you wherever you want to go. Sophie, you like fortune telling, don’t you?”

“Un.”

When Costas said that, Sophie gave a small nod, blushing a little.

“Sensei! Sensei! I’m the only one who doesn’t have anyone to go around with…”

Paris raised his hand in protest.

“You have fun on your own.” [TLN: I may not like you much, But I can relate. Pain.] [ED: basically me at my school festival eating sweets all alone.] [ED2: yall got festivals :,)]

“So cruel!”

Paris has a lot of friends so I’m sure he’ll be fine if he’s left alone.

“I’m actually looking forward to the bonfire later in the evening. Our school builds a pretty big fire.”

“Ahh… That’s nice.”

“Is that so?”

Anya nodded her head.

“Have you never participated in the evening festival before? Anya?”

She wasn’t really interested in the evening festival.

This girl is completely unrestrained. Even though there is a former member of the festival committee right by her side.

“We also put a lot of effort into our bonfires. We’ll make a big fire that you won’t normally see. The festival organizing committee will work hard. I recommend watching it, Anya-chan.”

“Hmm…”

Sophie, exhausted from her studies and slumped over her desk, was promoting the post-school festival to Anya to reward the hard work of the junior members of the festival committee.

“Whatever it is, it’ll be fun!”

Anya laughed as she giggled.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

And then the festival arrived.

There were glittering decorations, noisy crowds, and a clear, crisp autumn sky.

This school is one of the most famous prep schools in the country, so a lot of people come to view this cultural festival. The school was so crowded with people that it was really hard to even just go from the left side to the right. The cultural clubs are trying their best to present the results of their daily activities to the world. The light music club’s performance, the art club’s exhibition, and the drama club’s play were all very enthusiastic.

“Hey, guys. Did you come here to see Costas’ presentation?”

“Ah, Zeke. I knew he was weird.”

When I came to see Costas’ presentation at the chemistry club, Paris and a few of his friends were crowded in front of Costas’ exhibit.

“Hey, look at Zeke, he’s got an A0-sized page full of fine print talking about the appeal of poison.”

“You’re still the odd man out, aren’t you?”

“He hasn’t changed a bit since our first year, that guy.”

In front of him was Costas’ presentation poster, which was of course about his expertise in poison. He was allowed to display his research among the presentations of the Chemistry Department, after passing a few simple conditions (extremely strict conditions for Costas): no demonstration of the purification of poisons, no actual poisons, and the content to be checked by Sophie beforehand.

He hasn’t wavered since his first year of high school, or even since middle school, now has he…

“Why are all smart people so weird?”

“How am I supposed to answer that?” 

We were dumbfounded by our familiar schoolmates.

“Sophie sure has it tough huh, holding the reins of Costas.”

“That’s true.”

Everyone felt sorry for Sophie, who had to be pushed around by his outlandish behavior so often.

“See you around, Zeke.”

“Ahh.”

After watching Costas’ presentation, I parted ways with everyone briefly.

Going around the cultural festival. We walked through the lively atmosphere of our friends. This is our last cultural festival. It is recommended that we participate lightly so that it doesn’t act as a burden for our exams, but everyone was very enthusiastic as it was the final touch to our high school youth.

But what about me? 

I had the exact same experience once before. It was my last high school festival, my last high school class, and my last graduation ceremony. With a sense of melancholy that I would never be able to return to those years, I stepped forward and said goodbye to my life as a student at that high school.

What about it now? I’m back in high school life, in this last whirlwind of activities to do. I’m back where I was before I took the first step outside with loneliness in my heart that day. I don’t remember feeling so lonely now though.

I am 46 years old right now. In my previous life, I died at the age of twenty-eight, and so now I am currently eighteen, which adds up to forty-six. However, I looked at the enthusiasm and loneliness of the young people who were now eighteen, and just stared blankly at them.

People grow up. Anya, who I’ve been watching ever since she was a child, Sophie, Costas, and Paris, who have all grown up to be great people now. They’re growing older, experiencing new things, and moving forward one step at a time.

What about me? Am I really growing at all? Am I truly moving forward in this life?

I wonder if I have really moved on ever since I was 28. Maybe the same experience at the same time is not what makes a person grow. Maybe I am standing in front of the exact same step I took a long time ago, and this I am no further ahead than I really was at 28.

Maybe I’m the only one standing still at this point of life, not when I was 28, not when I am 46, not when I am 18. I have not been able to ride the current of time properly at all. The flow of time has not moved me forward even one step ahead than before.

I was left alone in the heat of everyone else’s loneliness.

“Ah, Zeke! Over here, over here!”

After watching a classical play, I joined Anya. Anya waved her hands in the air to indicate her position. I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at her childish gesture.

Afterwards, Anya and I looked around the cultural festival together.

At the haunted house, Anya repeatedly threatened me from the side. The people organizing the haunted house were troubled by Anya’s behavior.

All the events of the cultural festival are over.

The only thing left to do now was to have the bonfire afterwards, without the general public, in the school.

The sky was already dark and the bonfire was blazing. The flames rose high and fierce, feeding on the large, high wooden structures.

The light of the fire was red and intense. The hot red of the flames wavered in the center of the darkness, illuminating our hands, scorching the kindling, and making a popping sound every once in a while. But the lights of the campfire illuminated only part of the darkness. The other lights were minimal at best.

The red of the flames and the black of the night created a large contrast, tinting the people and the world in two different colors at once.

“Big! It’s so amazing! So strong!”

Anya was excited to see the big bonfire. Our school’s bonfire is made to be bigger than most other bonfires. This was the third time that I had actually seen this fire, but it still took my breath away with its power domineering over us.

“It’s big! It’s fun! This is so fun!”

Anya was looking up at the campfire with a childlike gleam in her eyes. The big, awesome thing seemed to suit Anya’s taste of curiosity.

“Burn! Burn more!”

Anya started talking like a criminal all of a sudden.

Everyone was enjoying the bonfire in their own way. Some joined in the dancing around the fire, some talked with friends whilst watching the flames, and some ate at the small booths set up near the fire. Paris was busy looking for a girl to dance with, pick up, and sink with.

“Yahoo, Anya-chan, Zeke, thanks for coming to the cultural festival.”

“Yo.”

“Sophie, Costas.”

Sophie and Costas approached us.

“Good work, Sophie. Looks like you’ve been doing a lot of work for this, huh.”

“Yes, I was asked to do a lot of things all because I was there on the festival committee last year.”

Sophie sounded exhausted. She had been asked for advice by many people over the last year, and she had helped them with their issues. Sophie was personable, firm, and probably very dependable. She is indeed a child with the talent of a manager.

“Sophie! This fire is so big and fun!”

“I’m glad you’re happy, Anya.”

“Let’s make the fire even bigger! More, more, more, so that it burns everything up!”

“Eeh?”

This bonfire was also planned by the festival committee. Anya was happily looking up at the big bonfire. It would be a great honor for the organizers to have this much fun. Sophie smiled, looking a bit troubled at her words.

“Well, Anya, Zeke. I hope you’re still having fun.”

“Ah, you two have fun too.”

Then they left us alone.

The flames were soaring high in the darkness. The red was swaying around in the night sky.

The flames burned loudly, scorching the burning wood. When the flames were extinguished, it was time for the festival to end. Everyone huddled around the large, powerful fire as if to comfort their sense of desolation.

When this flame is extinguished, one of the many milestones of our youth was over, and everyone will begin moving forward again. Those who live in the right time will move forward and become adults by the end of it.

But what about me? Am I really moving forward? When this flame goes out, will I be able to take some kind of step forward to a better life?

“Hey, Zeke!”

“Hmm?”

“Let’s dance too!”

Anya said unexpectedly, and before I could reply back to her, she took my hand and pulled me along with her. We approached everyone dancing lightly near the campfire and began to move our bodies as we wished.

“Come on, Zeke!”

“O-Oh…”

Before I could even think about it, I began to dance with Anya to the cheerful music playing nearby.

I was a little surprised. I had thought Anya had no interest in dancing at all. I guess the big fire in the campfire got her blood pumping. She started to dance happily with me.

I held hands with Anya and we danced a simple dance together. Both of us stepped awkwardly and giggled whenever we made simple mistakes. We were both new to dancing, so we danced very poorly. I held her soft hand. Her body and face are close to mine. Even though we’ve been together for such a long time, I still feel so nervous again without any discipline.

Yes. I was extremely nervous.

Anya looked beautiful.

She was taller, with a much more rounded, feminine body. Her face, which had been childish, was now neat and tidy, she had the face of a beautiful woman. Her breasts were swollen, her hands were clean and soft, and her body was beginning to radiate a lustrous atmosphere.

I’ve always treated her as a child to be cared for. I’ve always listened to her selfishness, challenged her, and nursed her, thinking that I had no choice. That’s what I thought for a long time.

But before I knew it, she had become an adult.

The flames dyed her pale-blue hair red. The pale blue of her hair, the red of the flames and the darkness of the night colored her brightly. The difference in color accentuated her growing maturity and made her hair look even more beautiful. The red of the flames illuminated her skin and her cheeks seemed to be dyed red.

　

It was beautiful.

I couldn’t help but stare at her silently.

She giggled, “What’s wrong?”

I turned my face away from her, embarrassed. Is my face turning red? I would be happy if the red of the flames would illuminate my face and deceive her. I thought.

She was growing.

Anya was growing up. Step by step, day by day, she’s becoming an adult little by little. It’s not only about her physical growth, but also her mental growth. Anya had just asked me to dance with her. It would have been an uncomfortable move coming from her in the past.

In the past, she had a tendency to treat things that didn’t interest her with indifference and to coldly dismiss people that she didn’t care about at all. She was the kind of girl who just stayed in her own shell, kept people away, and looked down on others quietly.

She was a girl with a sense of insecurity.

How about now? Now she’s friends with Sophie and Costas, she talks a little with Paris and has a couple of other female friends with her too.

And now she’s also interested in dancing and has invited me to join her in it. Her world is expanding little by little. Anya is not the only one who’s growing up. Sophie and Costas are also growing up. When I met Paris again, he looked different. All my friends are growing up.

I’m the only one who hasn’t changed.

I was the only one who hadn’t moved on. The gap was closing. Relatively speaking, I am becoming less of an adult with every day I live on. Everyone is looking up and growing up right.

Anya is expanding her world. She is slowly becoming an adult. Maybe she’s not a child I have to take care of anymore. Maybe the time when I have to worry about her is over, and the day has come for her to spread her wings into her own world.

Maybe the day will come soon when I will no longer be needed by her.

I thought that as I touched her skin and danced with her.

“Hey, Zeke…”

“Hmm?”

As we danced, Anya spoke to me.

“You’ll always support me right?”

She murmured with a faint smile and a smirk.

“…………”

I smiled trying my best not to look lonely at that sight.

As I danced with her, I was thinking something completely different than what she was thinking in her mind.

The hot flames of the campfire rose high in the sky and wavered, brightly seeming to be swallowed up by the dark sky above us.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Our days of competition were still going on.

The first time she defeated me in the midterm exam of the second year of high school, Anya was just so happy. After that day of defeat, Anya and I started to win and lose against each other again and again.

I was the overall winner of my second year of high school.

But in the third year of highschool my odds of winning was 50%…no, she was slightly better than me. I’m sure she’ll tell me the truth if I ask her about it since she keeps very meticulous records of it, but I’m too embarrassed to ask

From that time on, she began to study very joyfully. Up until now, she had been studying like a demon, working hard and training with the goal of defeating me, but after a series of close calls with me and not knowing who would win, she seemed to be enjoying learning.

One new discovery brought a smile to my face.

Strangely enough, my academic performance began to improve more steadily than when I had been studying like a demon.

“Are you having fun?”

I asked.

“You understand how I feel?”

“Yeah, we’ve known each other for a long time.”

“It’s been over ten years. Oh, that’s a long time. I’m in trouble.”

That’s right, this relationship is still ongoing.

Even now, when our academic abilities are so close to each other, we are still having study sessions together. I once said to her, “Is there any point in doing this anymore?” 

“Zeke’s teaching style is much easier to understand than our teacher’s.”

When she told me that, I couldn’t just say that I would stop the study group.

“Yeah… It’s been a while.”

As I stared up at the ceiling of her room, I remembered how far I had come. Elementary school, middle school, and then high school. No, much more. It was even longer than that.

I was thinking back to my previous life. I have been thinking back to my previous life a lot lately.

“Oi, Why did you use the past tense for ‘It’s been so long’ we got in the same university together. So our relationship will go on and on.”

“Ah, yeah, we did.”

Our first choice of university is the best university in the country. The results of our mock exams are A, so we will probably enter the same university together.

But that’s all it’ll be.

The cracks are getting bigger and bigger, and I’m about to reach a point where I won’t be able to fix them. No, this was a ticking time bomb that could never be fixed anymore.

We’re going to be going to the same university together.

But the time when we part from each other is not far off anymore.

“Hey Zeke, what’s up?”

When Anya called out to me, I jolted.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I was just a little spaced out. It’s nothing.”

“Lies…”

She saw through me immediately.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

“W-What?”

“Zeke’s secret”

I was thrown for a loop. In an instant, my heart shook and I shuddered.

“Lately, you have been thinking a lot about something. You’ve been thinking about something a lot lately, and you’re having trouble with it. At first, I thought it was just a needless worry. I also thought that maybe you were worried about me catching up with you in your studies. But it’s not. I know that because we’ve known each other for a long time”

“─────”

“I thought it was a secret. It’s something that everyone has, so it doesn’t really bother me. But what Zeke has is a little different. It’s a little different from the secrets everyone has….”.

The room was quiet. There was not a single sound except for her words.

It became so quiet I could hear the sound of my heart beating hard.

“I didn’t notice it until recently. We’ve known each other this long and I finally realized it for the first time. Zeke has been hiding things for a long, long time. Ever since the first time we met. For a long, long time, you have been troubled with something I don’t know about.”

I couldn’t do anything but stare in amazement. My secret, which I had never told anyone, was slowly showing through in her eyes. Anya hugged her knees, half hiding her face, and looked up at me as if she were peering into my eyes.

“Hey, is it something you can’t tell me about?”

“…………”

“…………”

“…………”

A long silence descended. The only sound I could barely hear was the sound of me gulping and spitting.

“I can’t tell you about it.”

That was all I could say.

“Alright…‘

A hint of disappointment crossed her face.

“I want you to wait a few more years…… Just a few more years.”

“Eh?‘

“I’ll tell you everything then.”

When I said that, Anya nodded several times. I leaned back and looked up. The ceiling of her room had already become a familiar sight.

A few more years. A few more years and all will come to light. It had become a familiar sight.

That’s when it ends.

It’s time for everything to fall apart and for her to finally be disappointed in me.

Anya, do you know what’s been happening? I’ve been cheating for a long time.

To tell you the truth, I’ve been studying for higher education and university entrance exams since I was in middle school. I started to see the cracks in middle school, and I got scared of losing more and more, so I began studying for it ahead of time.

But, you’re still catching up with me in the end.

And after all this time, I’m finally about to get overtaken by you.

That’s who I truly am……

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

“Thank goodness~~~~~”

The sound of cries echoed throughout the classroom.

“I got in, I’m so gladddddddddd~~~”

Sophie was crying out loud, tears and snot dripping down her face in a powerful stream. They were not sad tears, no. They were happy tears.

Today was the day that the examination scores were announced.

“Here, wipe your tears, I’ll give you a handkerchief.”

“But… My snot…‘

“You don’t have to return that handkerchief back to me.”

With a whoosh, Anya’s handkerchief was stained with the fruits of Sophie’s efforts and excitement.

“It’s unusual for Anya to take care of people…”

“That’s because Sophie is someone close to me.”

Costas and I were amazed at what we saw. I was more impressed by the way Anya had grown up, taking care of Sophie at this moment.

“Anyway, congratulations on passing, guys.”

“Congratulations!”

The four of us here have successfully been accepted into the schools of our choice. Me, Anya, Sophie, and Costas were accepted into the most difficult university in the country.

Sophie was crying profusely. I, Anya, and Costas had been rather relaxed, but Sophie was desperate and frantic. The way she looked now was an eloquent testament to that desperation. Because of her mother’s policy, Sophie was only allowed to apply to the most difficult universities. That’s why Sophie’s desperation was even greater than others. I sometimes thought she had a terrible mother.

We were now free from exams. We brought snacks, rented a room in the multi-purpose room, and had a small party after school. Sophie smiled happily as she imagined her college life. Anya was chewing on a lot of sweets, saying a little offhandedly that everything present should just come to her. Costas calmly looked up information about the university and passed it on to everyone.

They were all fantasizing about a future that they did not yet know about.

I’m the only one who knows. I know of its freedom, its joy, its pain and its difficulty.

I was the only one who knew about college life over here.

I grabbed my bag and went to the vending machine to buy some canned juice for everyone.

That’s where we met.

“Ah…………”

“…………”

“…………”

“Yo…”

I ran into Paris by chance. The air was awkward, but he paused for a moment and greeted me as if it was nothing.

We were applying to the same university together, but-

─ Paris had failed.

“Congratulations on getting in, that’s awesome Zeke.”

“Thank you.”

Paris congratulated me. It must have been hard for him currently.

“…………”

“…………”

“Ahh….”

Paris scratched his head. The four of us had passed but Paris had failed. The awkward atmosphere would continue flowing in no matter what.

“Sorry, I can’t say anything witty at a time like this.”

“You have nothing to apologize for…”

Paris let out a small laugh.

I know exactly how Paris feels. I failed almost all of my exams in my previous life, failed almost all of my first year exams, did a re-entry exam, didn’t get my first choice, and went to my second choice university. I felt sadness as if I had been denied myself, helpless regret that I hadn’t tried hard enough, and I could truly feel the contrast between the joy of those around me and my own sadness.

I know. I feel it. I can understand Paris’s pain.

I won’t make the mistake of saying I know how he feels, since I got in this time. From his perspective, I’m a person who got in without knowing any setbacks my whole life. In his eyes, I’m a person who doesn’t understand how he feels, I’m a person who can’t understand how he feels.

“Are you going for a reexamination?”

“Nah, I think I’ll go to my second choice instead.”

“Is that so, I think that’s good.”

“Thanks, man.”

It’s also the right path for him. I also went to my second choice in my previous life, and I had a fulfilling college life.

But I couldn’t tell him that.

“That college was too hard for me.”

“That’s not true.”

“Ha, Thanks…”

I bought a coffee for him as well and gave it to him. He smiled helplessly. Indeed, his chances of getting accepted were low. He was a little short of the requirement and was more likely to fail. Paris had also predicted this outcome in the end.

“Aaaaah! Stop, stop, stop!”

Paris shouted loudly.

“I don’t belong in the dark! I’m going out to eat! I’m going to go to an all-you-can-eat barbecue party with the other fallen guys!”

“…………”

Paris smiled. He was so strong.

“I’ll see you later. Congrats on passing Zeke!”

“…………”

With that, he turned his back to me and started walking. I looked at his back, which is much bigger than it was when I was in study hall.

I didn’t get there in my first life. I studied hard and went through a lot of hardships to take the entrance exam, but I could not possibly have the academic ability to challenge the most difficult universities in the country.

But Paris took the challenge. For the first time in his life, he took on the most difficult challenge without cheating in any way. It’s not something just anyone can do. It’s not for everyone to be able to challenge themselves there. 

“Paris!”

I called out to his back. His feet stopped.

“You did great!”

“…………”

I was watching. I watched him suffer and study. I even taught him how to study sometimes. Paris was always trying so hard.

He was doing his best.

“Good job!”

“…………”

“You did great…”

I condensed the words I wanted to say and presented them to him. He turned to me and smiled.

“Thanks, man.”

“…………”

He was laughing. What a strong man.

“I know we’re going to different colleges, but I hope you’ll still invite me to hang out with you again.”

“Of course.”

“Let’s hang out again sometime!”

With that, he left.

Thus ended our examinations.

Anya and I had no trouble getting a ticket to the highest and most difficult school in the country. In the self-assessment of the entrance exam, I scored higher than Anya. Anya, who was also very enthusiastic about competing, seemed to be quite disappointed at that.

I looked at it and smiled.

This was my final act of determination.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

I had a dream.

It’s a dream about the heavy snow.

It was a dream of the special heavy snow, the day I had died in my previous life.

I was in a white room, looking out the window at the heavy snowfall.

The whole area was white. It was no longer just a snowflake, but a cluster of snowflakes, falling incessantly from top to bottom.

It was the heaviest snowfall ever recorded. I was envious of this snow.

I was envious of the term “special”.

In my previous life, I had never been able to get out of the realm of mediocrity, and no matter how far I thought back, I had never been able to deviate from my ordinary life.

We cry, we laugh, we get angry, we get in trouble, we try hard, we invent and we strive to live for a better life.

Life is hard, and even if you use 120% of your strength, it will not let you walk through that path easily. The hardships of life are so high that sometimes you just have to cry, stomp on the ground, scream about how unfair and unreasonable it is, and tear your body to pieces. But somehow you can still manage to overcome them.

And that’s what I call a mediocre life.

In my previous life, I was an ordinary person, and what I went through was nothing more than an ordinary life. There was happiness, there was suffering, there was no more, and there was a tattered life, that was the ordinary life I led.

I was yearning to be ‘special.’

I longed for something ‘special’ like this heavy snowfall outside my room.

And then I ‘reincarnated.’

So, how was I this time around?

I wonder if I’ve become someone ‘special.’

Indeed, almost all of my grades in school were at the number one spot, and I was able to get into the most difficult university with little ease.

‘Special.’ In the eyes of any other person, I would be termed as someone ‘Special.’

But guess what.

I wonder how I would compare to this heavy snowfall.

I wonder if I have the power to change the world at all. Do I have even a fraction of the power of this heavy snow?

I wonder if I could have been the heavy snowfall that I envied so long.

There’s no way I could be such a thing……

My nature had not changed at all since my previous life. This window pane did not become a mirror, and my image did not turn into heavy snow.

It’s easy to see what the cracks in my life are.

That just means that I wasn’t good enough for Anya.

---

TLN: Boy I’m back, Anyways this chapter took me 2 days of ACTUALLY WORKING HARD and my editors just shredded it in like 5 hours so I’m going to cry in a corner after this. Thank you Spynine01 and Samheart564 for editing this. I post sneak peeks here and there in the discord so join and say Hi if your interested. I promise the next reckless chapter would be sooner. If you see and possible mistranslation or type feel free to leave it in the comments or join the discord. Here’s my Ko-fi if you’d like to support me since I worked so hard. Aight Imma go cry in my corner now! Obligatory discord plug.